Self-managementStress management

What is Self Management?

Self-management, also referred to as ‘self-control’ is the ability to control one’s emotions, thoughts and behaviour effectively in different situations. This also includes motivating oneself, and setting goals.

Basics of Self-Management

Improve yourself in various skills including:

  1. discipline
  2. timeliness
  3. goal-setting
  4. problem solving
  5. teamwork
  6. professionalism

and, etc. Once you develop your personality and abilities in these areas, you will be able to succeed in personal as well as professional life.

Skills you should master to succeed in life

  1. Self-awareness: Ask for honest feedback. Gather insights on your personality and work-specific proficiencies. Think about your daily interactions and how you handled situations well or could have handled them differently.
  2. Responsibility: Taking responsibility for your tasks is very important. Taking ownership is the step towards self-development. For example, if you have been assigned a task by a teacher; ensure you take complete ownership. Even if you are unable to complete the task on time, you must report it and then correct it.
  3. Time Management: Prioritise the things you have to do. Remove waste and redundancy from work. Make a time table and follow it diligently.
  4. Adaptability: Stay current with best practices and read up on new information always. Prepare yourself for new changes, so that you can transition seamlessly.

Stress Management

Stress can be defined as our emotional, mental, physical and social reaction to any perceived demands or threats. These demands or threats are called stressors. Stressors are the reason for stress.

For Example:

  1. you are too close to the exams but feel unprepared.
  2. you are experiencing a loss of someone close in the family.
  3. you are worried about what people would think of you if you don’t dress well or cannot speak confidently.
  4. you are stressed due to lack of sleep.

The stress created by a deadline to finish a paper can motivate you to finish the assignment on time. But when experienced in excess or for a long period of time, stress has the opposite effect. It can harm our emotional and physical health, and limit our ability to function well at home, in school and within our relationships.

The ultimate goal of Stress Management is to strike a balance between life, work, relationships, relaxation and fun.

ABC Strategy of Stress Management

  • A: Adversity or the stressful event
  • B: Beliefs or the way you respond to the event
  • C: Consequences or actions and outcomes of the event

Management Techniques

  • Time Management: Proper time management is one of the most effective stress-relieving techniques.
  • Physical exercise and fresh air: A healthy lifestyle is essential for students. Stress is generally lower in people who maintain a healthy routine. Doing yoga, meditation and deep breathing exercises help in proper blood circulation and relaxes the body. Even taking a walk or playing in the park will help you get a lot of fresh oxygen, which will help you become more active.
  • Healthy diet: Having a healthy diet will also help you reduce stress. Eating a balanced diet, such as Dal, Roti, vegetables and fruits will give you the strength to do your daily work efficiently.
  • Positivity: Focussing on negative aspects of life will add more stress. Instead, learn to look at the good things and stay positive. For example, instead of feeling upset over a scoring less in a test, try to maintain a positive attitude and look at ways to improve the next time. Self-management Skills 43
  • Organising academic life; no delaying: By keeping class notes organised, finishing in assignments on time, and keeping track of all deadlines, stress can be reduced to a great extent.
  • Sleep: We should get a good night’s sleep for at least 7 hours so that your brain and body gets recharged to function better the next day.
  • Holidays with family and friends: Going to a relative’s place, such as your grandparents’ house or a new place during your summer vacations can help you break from the

Ability to Work Independently

If you can become a calm and relaxed person, you will have the ability to work independently, which means:

  1. Becoming self-aware, self-monitoring and self-correcting.
  2. knowing what you need to do.
  3. taking the initiative rather than being told what to do.
  4. recognising your mistakes and not blaming others.
  5. having the ability and the will to learn continuously.

Emotional Intelligence

Emotional intelligence is the ability to identify and manage one’s own emotions, as well as the emotions of others.

Emotional awareness: the ability to identify and name one’s own emotions.

Harnessing emotions: the ability to harness and apply emotions to tasks like thinking and problem solving.

You can manage stress, keep your brain active and open-minded, and easily overcome failures if you can keep your emotions in check. Emotional intelligence can also help you have better relations with your friends and family.

What is Self-awareness?

Being self-aware means that you can identify your strengths and weaknesses. Self-awareness, therefore, will help you in converting your weakness into strength and strength into an exceptional talent. Analysing your strengths and weaknesses helps you to attain success in life. However, strength and weakness analysis begins with knowing yourself first.


Here are some examples of what could be someones strengths and weaknesses:


  1. I am good at creative writing.
  2. I am confident of speaking in front of an audience.
  3. I play guitar very well.


  1. I find it difficult to solve mathematics problems.
  2. I would like to speak English fluently.
  3. I do not like to lose in any game or sport.


There are some techniques for Identifying your Strengths and Weaknesses, For Instance:

Techniques for identifying your strengths

  • Think of anything that you are always successful at.
  • Think about what others like in you.
  • Take out time and think about what you do well.Weaknesses

Techniques for identifying your weaknesses

  • Point out the areas where you struggle and the things you find difficult to do.
  • Look at the feedback others usually give you.
  • Be open to feedback and accept your weaknesses without feeling low about it. Take it as an area of improvement.

Answer these questions to end your search

You can find your strengths and weaknesses once you find answers to the questions given here.

  1. How am I different from others?
  2. What do I do better than others?
  3. What do other people admire in me?
  4. What makes me stand out?
  5. Where do I worry and struggle?
  6. Where, how and why do others perform better than me?
  7. What advice for improvement do I often receive from others?

Interests VS Abilities

Things that you like to do in your free time that make you happy.An acquired or natural capacity
Things you are curious about or would do even if no one asked you to do it.Enable you to perform a particular job or task with considerable proficiency.
Things you want to learn or would like to do in the future.

When your interests do not match your abilities, you can either improve your abilities or follow some other path.

What is Self-Motivation?

Self-motivation is simply the force within you that drives you to do things. Self-motivation is what pushes us to achieve our goals, feel happy and improve our quality of life.

The things that need to be done without someone or something influencing us.

Types of Motivation

There are broadly two types of motivation that we’ll be covering in our syllabus:

Internal Motivation: LOVE

We do things because they make us happy, healthy and feel good. For example, when you perform on your annual day function and you learn something new, such as dancing, singing, etc., you feel good.

External Motivation: REWARD

We do things because they give us respect, recognition and appreciation. For example, Suresh participated in a 100m race and won a prize. This motivated him to go for practice every morning.

Qualities of Self-motivated People

Some of the qualities of self-motivated people are stated below:

  1. They Know what they want from life
  2. They Are focussed
  3. They Know what is important
  4. They Are dedicated to fulfill their dreams

Building Self-motivation

There are four steps for building self-motivation, which are as given below.

1. Find out your strengths

Identify your likes and dislikes. Understand what makes you happy. For example, I love cooking.

2. Set and focus on your goals

Define the goalsyou want to achieve and focus all your energy to achieve your goal. For example, I want to be a chef.

4. Stay loyal to your goals

Work towards achieving your goal, even when you are facing difficult time. For example, even though I did not clear the Hotel management entrance exam, I will find out other ways to become a chef.

3. Develop a plan to achieve your goals

Plan and set timelines to achieve your goals, Plan a list of activities that you will do to achieve each goal. For example, after schooling, you may be required to appear for a competitive examination to join Hotel Management Institute.

What is Self-Regulation?

Goal setting is a very essential factor in your personal life. The process of goal setting in your life helps you decide on how to live your life, where you want to be, and how you want to be in the future.

Goals : They are a set of dreams with a deadline to get them, for example, saving pocket money to buy a favourite mobile phone by a particular date.

Goal setting: It is all about finding and listing your goals and then planning on how to achieve them.

How to Set Goal ?

We can use SMART method to set goals. SMART Stands for:

Specfic A specific and clear goal answers six questions.

  1. Who is involved in the goal?
  2. What doI want to do?
  3. Where do I start?
  4. When do I start and finish?
  5. Which means do I use?
  6. Why am I doing this?
  1. Not a specific goal: “I would learn to speak English.”
  2. Specific goal: “I would learn to speak Englis fluently by joining coaching classes after my school everyday, and in six months I will take part in the inter-school debate competition.”

Measureable: A measureable goal answers the questions

  1. “How much?”,
  2. “How many?” and
  3. “How do I know that I have achieved results?”


  1. Not measurable goal: “I want to be rich.”
  2. Measurable goal: “I want to have 5 times more money than what I have today in my hand at the end of this year.”

Achievable: Breaking down big goals into smaller parts will make the goal achievable.

Bigger Goal: “I want to become a teacher in my school.”

Breaking it into smaller goals:

  1. Complete higher secondary
  2. Complete Graduation
  3. Complete B.Ed.
  4. Apply for jobs in the teaching field


  1. Not measurable goal: “I want to be rich.”
  2. Measurable goal: “I want to have 5 times more money than what I have today in my hand at the end of this year.”

Realistic : A realistic goal would be something that we want to achieve and can work towards


  1. Unrealistic goal: “I want to be rich.”
  2. Realistic goal: “I spend 3 hours every day of the year after school to revise my subjects to get good marks in the exams.”

Time bound : A SMART goal should have a timeframe by when the goal needs to be achieved. This encourages us to take actions to completely fulfill the goals.


  1. Not a time bound goal: “I want to lose 10 kg someday.”
  2. Time bound goal: “I want to lose 10kg in the next 6 months.”

What is time-management?

Time management is the ability to plan and control how you spend the hours of your day well and do all that you want to do.

An example of good time management skills would be when you decide to finish your homework immediately after school so you have time to watch TV later in the evening.

Advantages of time management?

Time management is the thinking skill that helps you to complete tasks on time,

  1. make a daily timetable.
  2. make a good guess at how long it will take you to do something.
  3. submit homework and assignments on time.
  4. not waste time during the day.

Four steps for effective time management?


  • We plan our dayto-day activities.
  • We make a timetable that we follow.
  • We keep our surroundings and study table clean and mess free.
  • We put things back where they belong.
  • It helps us save time!


  • We make a to-do list that has all our activities and we rank them in the order of importance.
  • For example, you may rank doing homework as the most important task.
  • It helps us to get the most important task done first and also to track what is pending.


  • We have a control over our activities and time.
  • We avoid time wasters like chatting on the phone, surfing gossip sites, etc., and focus on more important things.


  • We identify and note where we have spent our time.
  • This will help us analyse if we have used our time effectively or not.
  • It also helps us to identify time-wasting activities

Practicing tips for effective time management

Avoid delay or postponing any planned activity

  1. Organise your room and school desk
  2. Develop a ‘NO DISTURBANCE ZONE’, where you can sit and complete important tasks
  3. Use waiting time productively
  4. Prepare a ‘To-do’ list
  5. Prioritise
  6. Replace useless activities with productive activities

Visit other chapters of Employability Skills:

Communication Skills

Entrepreneurial Skills

Green Skills

Information and Communication Technology Skills